Friday, December 31, 2021

Colombia Country Number 51

When I mention Colombia, what are the first things that come to mind? Naturally it is Pablo Escobar, cocaine, narcos, guns and all the violence that swallowed that era of this country's history. There is no reason to gloss over it, Colombia has a deep, dark and disturbing modern history and, today much of the country has real struggles with poverty, homelessness, drug addiction and crime which is all wrapped up nicely with an obscene Government Corruption bow.

*NERD FUN FACTS**
Click Here to discover 35 interesting facts about Colombia. These include being the second most Bio Diverse country in the world, The most bio diverse when it comes to birds. Number 1 in Emerald production and it is often voted among the happiest countries in the world. 




Sitting in the Cancun airport waiting for my flight to Medellin I suddenly had a moment of "holy shit, I am going to Medellin! Very much like the first time I flew to Nicaragua I was excited to go, but my Spidey senses were on full overdrive, which in hindsight and a bit of honesty, saying they were my Spidey senses sounds cooler than the fact there was a bit of fear residing in my bravado. I have travelled extensively to some historically dark countries and each and every time, except for being robbed in Bolivia, the countries were spectacular in their own ways. However, I was heading into a modern historical hell hole and until you actual put your "boots on the ground", you are going to be prejudicial until you know better.

I felt the expected surge of adrenaline as the plane started the decent into the Medellin Airport. This is Colombia, country number 51 for me. Customs and Immigration were a breeze and actually quite welcoming. I figured I would get a SIM card once I settled into my hostel, not sure why I made that decision but it was Medellin and I just wanted to get a pint at the first Pub I could find and start to soak it all in. Now, usually when arriving by air into a new country, I treat myself to a private airport pickup, one of my few travel luxuries. I just like seeing my name on a placard being held my a smiling face, well hopefully smiling. Well there was Carlos was  there with the sign with my name on it and a big welcoming grin. It was a $45 ride and later I found out that Ubers price was about 10 bucks so Carlos was having a good day. 




I arrived late in the afternoon of Dec 31st. so, New Years Eve in Medellin Colombia! Lets be painfully honest, I will still be in bed and asleep by 11. I flew Avianca from Cancun and there was an oddly organized deplaning process There was an announcement for everyone to stay in their seats and they will call people by rows in order to disembark. They made this announcement three times in both English and Spanish, using Covid as the reason. As you can expect, a few people did not get the memo and stood up to access their bags which was just pavlovian response that so many people have when they land. It got pretty funny when the young couple in front of me became aware something was off as they stood in the aisle trying to access their bags from the overhead compartment. You could see the mixture of confusion and terror on their faces, why were most people still sitting? There were others who looked at those standing so they stood up too (monkey see, monkey do) but looked around with a bit of trepidation, have standing half sitting. Again a calm but clearly agitated voice came over the PA, "please sit down and we will disembark by selected rows". People really are dumb.

It was an excellent experience. The first 15 rows on the right were called. When they left the plane the first 15 on the left and so one, 15 rows at a time. Orderly and eerily calm. I am repeating myself, this should be the normal operation procedure on all airlines. Well with the exceptions of any Airline from the United States because people would complain that their rights were being trampled on. They have the right to stand whenever they wanted. If they could stand only when they were told to do so, that would be Socialism, come on, you know I am right.



As I said, Immigration was breeze and I did make a small observation on the power of the Canadian Passport. While in the queue (still my favorite English word. The letter Q followed by silent u and e) for immigration everyone has their passports out at the ready. Me being the creeper I can be, I am always trying and peek to see where people around me are are from. There were many Mexicans, a few Russians, France and an American. As  the Mexicans moved forward each  person was with immigration for a bit longer than was seemed to be the usual about of time. Again, things you notice when standing in a long line waiting for you turn.. There seemed to be lots of questions, validation of documents (from mobile phones of course) and sullen looks towards the Mexicans. I thought Colombian Border Control sure are an angry lot. The Russians had lots of paperwork, which I figured was obvious with visa requirements. The French were asked quite a few questions but the agent seemed polite. The American, ah the American. He was giving it a go with really bad Spanglish, BUT I actually heard him say, ",but I am an American". I have no idea why anyone from the United States thinks that is some sort of "get out of jail free card" in life. He was stamped and let through but you could tell they were making it difficult for him just because. Now it's my turn right after Mr. USA. Canadian, American, its all the same to them right. I think I peed a little as I slowly walked up to my executioner. I opened my passport to the picture side, politely said "Buenas Tardes". He smiled and said, "Proof of Vaccine" in excellent English. I opened it on my phone and he smiled and then replied "2 Pfiser, Good". He then stamped my passport and said, "Enjoy Colombia." It took 30 - 45 seconds, tops.

If you have ever seen the movie Midnight Express, where the main character, Billy, finally escapes from prison. He is walking away slowly and trying not to run so as to not draw attention to himself. That would be me as I wandered into the Medellin airport.


It was mid afternoon on New Years Eve 2022. How insane was this town going to be? Not to worry because I have not seen midnight in about 15 years. Just don't run dammit!


No comments: